16 April, 2007

so here is my question (and I would actually like to hear your opinion),

CAN YOU EVER DEMAND AN APOLOGY???


Without giving too much away... Is it right (?) to ask someone to apologize for something they did a while ago, something they did to you, maybe as a child, that you feel they should have to take responsibility for? Is it right (okay, just, correct) to expect someone to feel guilty for what they did, maybe without meaning to, an extended amount of time ago?

And either way, how do you start that conversation without it being accusatory or putting the other person automatically on the defensive? The best I can come up with is, "Ya know, I'm trying to deal with some things that happened in my past, and I really think that if I could just get you to understand that how you treated me, (or didn't treat me) hurt, and here are the repercussions I see of that decision."

So maybe it's not forgiveness - but, more, how do you let someone who doesn't know they're massacred your heart (or doesn't want to hear they've massacred your heart) know that it still affects you, and all your attempts to "get over it" from your end have failed, miserably, and so you need them to at least admit that their decisions, actions, whatever did in fact cause some of your present pain? Because to some, that admission that, "Yes I am a jerk" would do a lot to healing a heart...



But can you expect that of another person?

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