21 January, 2007

Sometimes I wonder if I'm not an 8 year old trapped in a 23 year old's body.

I want to play Barbie’s
And have my only responsibility be which game to play
I still love stuffed animals
And Disney Movies
I cannot finish an adult book
But love the BFG and Winnie the Pooh
I can't carry an adult conversation
I run my hands thru the snow when riding down the esclator
People showing any affection grosses me out
And boys have cooties for sure!

Part of me wonders if this is why I cannot pick a job. I long to spend my days playing office, not actually going to one. I want to dream about the world and imagine others living their lives - not answer phones and give tours! I don't want student loan payments because I'm not done learning. I can't take the GMAT - that's for adults. And I am still a kid, who wants to read books and become someone else, and discover what I want to do.

I'm not an adult, I'm not. I don't want to pay bills and work and worry about if I'll ever find someone and if I'm making a mistake moving so far from home. I want to wake-up, eat Lucky Charms, and spend my days being a princess in the woods.

Growing up sucks,

...And I am not ready for it.

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© Amanda Lunday