31 January, 2005

“Likewise urge young men to be sensible in all things show yourself to be an example of good deeds, with purity in doctrine, dignified, sound in speech which is beyond reproach, so that the opponent will be put to shame, having nothing bad to say about you…” Titus 2:6-8

I came across this verse my freshman year; it comes back to me at different time as a charge of how we should live. Last week a chapel on accountability really stuck because I feel that sometimes because I am a "leader" on campus it is harder to struggle and ask for accountability. But because of my position I almost need more accountability. The accountability of staying faithful to God, of not letting this position become more than it should, of not becoming too busy that I forget to feel and release.

For me it is easy to get on this “accomplish” mode where classes have to be attended, homework has to get done, forms have to get processes, people have to be seen, meetings have to be kept – and anything beyond that gets pushed aside. It is in these times that God gets forgotten and the opposite of the things listed in Titus get done. I have to admit when I read this verse I realize how far from it I am. I struggle with gossip and anger and venting frustrations to people instead of God. I go to other people to talk about how mad/hurt I am with someone else, instead of just going to them…

Christians throw words like accountability and authenticity around without ever really stopping to think what practical applications of these words are. I got into a heated discussion on Saturday about all the things I don’t like about my school and all the things I struggle with here – in the end the things that get me down the most are the simple things that could be changed with a word/deed/the truth, by having purity in doctrine, and soundness is speech I tell you this to say that we sometimes let our struggles become apparent to one or two people while trying to hide them before everyone else. I’m not saying your life has to be an open book to everyone, but I think accountability and authenticity start by telling the small things. And realizing that we all need grace – so why not live like it?
Just some thoughts this Monday morning. Take care.

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