22 November, 2004

hey there.

I apologize for the delay in writing. It's been a rough couple of weeks - classes have been busy and then there is the daily grind of life. It's hard for me to really articulate what's going on, because I am not entirely sure. This semester has been overwhelming - not overwhelming because I have so much to do and no idea how to get it all done -overwhelming because there are so many emotions I cannot control, so many questions/uncertainties I cannot comprehend... Life is life and that sucks. I like someone -they don't like me. I don't know what to do next summer. My sister is having a really hard time and while the rest of my family wishes we could snap our fingers and make it all okay, that's impossible...

Living in a freshmen stairwell is taking a lot out of me. I love the girls I am surrounded with, and couldn't imagine a time without them - but it is such a challenge to get through a week. There are times you don't have enough to give anyone and yet there are people wanting to talk, wanting to be around, and all you want to do is climb into a hole and let the night pass.

this isn't meant to sound so dramatic -more of an explanation than anything else. I hope you have a joyous Thankgiving. I wish someone could explain how being home, though all the problems are still here, makes everything seem small and conquerable.

oh well, until next time.

“Courage does not always roar. sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow" - Mary Anne Radmacher

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© Amanda Lunday