16 February, 2004

I hate emotions - I hate how you care for people you shouldn't (and can't honestly explain why you do) and how feelings are always guaranteed to be reciprocal.
I am going through a time of really hard trials. There isn’t much in my life that makes me smile and I feel fake whenever I try to be happy or appear okay – and I don’t want to let people in because how could they ever understand what’s going on? It’s a silly girl thing, or at least that’s the excuse I give it.

To be honest there isn’t too much I feel like writing about – let’s just say that I need prayer; prayer for guidance, peace and direction. Honestly I need to know God is there and that I haven’t been abandoned – I know that He is there but sometimes it feels like I am standing alone… The next few weeks are going to be hard and I need all the peace I can get.

Anyway, I am going to go. Promise to write more soon.
© Amanda Lunday