16 November, 2003

Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind.
"Pooh!" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw. "I just wanted to be sure it was you."

there is something about friends that you just can't quite place and don't really want to deny. there are so many times that i have been saved by a simple hello from a friend. and the amazing things is that no two friendships of mine are the same. some people are my rock, others are comforters, others just make me laugh - and a very select few are all the above to me. my friend meg said something really amazing the other day - she said that there are some friends who don't make the effort to see you who you know still love you - and then there are others who don't and you know they never really cared. it's amazing to me - the more i know - the more i learn - the more people i meet and experiences i go through - i realize that my life will be defined by the people who remain. i want to invest in people so i have a plethora of people to dance with in heaven - my cousin tisa said it best "let's dance together in heaven mandie.... dance with wild, crazy joy and complete freedom."
there are so many times, like tonight, when i wish for nothing more then to dance with my Father and just be there with Him. I want to sit beside His throne and in the tabernacle and just be with the One who created me. it's an amazing desire that grows more daily. and that desire is some what satisfied when i am able to be with someone who is close to me. last night i babysat and my niece fell asleep on my lap. her whole little body fit across me. and i sat there watching her sleep, and dream about whatever 9 month olds dream about and all i could see was heaven - there is a song lyric "maybe heaven's all around us, but only seen through childrens' eyes" maybe that's true. maybe before this world teaches us to reach for the tangible and tells us what to think and believe - maybe we see heaven... i also realize heaven in some of my friends. people who can turn a simple trip to boulder into a refreshing break from the reality that threatens to overwhelm me... or, by just coming over and sitting beside me they can remind me of simple truths forgotten without speaking.
c.s. lewis said, "god give me another set of eyes." and god has granted that to me. i can't believe that changes happening - i realized today that i am falling helplessly in love with my God and there is no one around who can woo me like He does. I have surrendered completely to Him and I am loving the feeling He is placing in my heart.

this song was playing on my cd player and so i thought i'd give you the words.
"i need words as wide as sky. i need language large as this longing inside. and i need a voice bigger than mine. and i need a song to sing you that i've yet to find. i need you, oh i need you. i need you, oh i need you to be here now. to be here now." (dave crowder band).

i am overwhelmed by the blessing i see revealed in my life and the lives of those around me...
© Amanda Lunday